My plan is to go to China after Hari Raya.

On 18th.September 2006 I sent my wife's car ,the Proton Kembara to my favourite workshop in Shah Alam to have the engine repaired .There was leakage either the engine oil or the gear oil. The car had to be kept overnight at the workshop for the mechanic to identify the leakage .Finally ,it was confirmed that the leakage was from the gearbox .No wonder the gear oil was almost empty. For the repair it cost me RM 768.00 . Then the mechanic pointed to me that the tyres were almost bald and told me it was dangerous especially during the rainy season . The 4 tyres cost me another RM.680.00 .All in all I had to spend RM. 1448.00 on the Kembara . What to do ? The car is a necessity and I've got no choice.It looks like I cannot keep money any more because there is always something to spend . Time is not like those days when I was still working , I always have at least RM. 10,000.00 in my current account. Luckily I have some income from rentals of my property . If I were just to depend on my pension alone I would not survive during this difficult time of inflation .

In a few days time on 24th.September 2006 we would be starting our fasting month ,Ramadhan . It would be for the first time that we are are going to fast in our new home in Klang .I hope we would fulfill our obligation to God with sincerety and with His blessings .

I am planning to go to China with my wife after the Hari Raya .The plan was postponed a number of times . I hope this time it would go through .

I am not suffering from ghout.

On 14th.September 2006 I went for my appointment with my doctor at Tanglin Clinic,Kuala Lumpur. I was surprised when the doctor told me that the pain on my left knee was not due to ' ghout ' . He told me that it could be due to the ' liquid ' in between the two knee bones was getting dry and that they were hurting each other . Any way to confirm his opnion I was sent to the X-ray Department to have my leg x-rayed . I will get to see the report only after a week.In the mean time I still feel pain on my left knee and could not walk and stand for a long time .How could this happen to me while I was such an active person before . I reckon my weight has got a part for the predicament which I am in today .I am determined to reduce my weight as advised by the doctor .It was not that I did not make any attempt to reduce my weight. Infact I tried very hard but I could not overcome my desire for food . Any way after this I should be able to overcome it .

On 16th.September 2006 although I had to walk slowly and slightly limping ,I brave myself to drive to Akademi Islam, University Malaya to attend my weekly class .I just could not afford to miss my classes .I need the knowledge and that's the place where I could get them .That day I also got my semester results . I was so happy because I passed all my papers and more so I manage to score 2 As . I am now in my final semeseter and hope I would do well in the final exams which is due to be in December .

Today is Sunday .No one is in the house except me and my wife .Feel so lonely .

Eileen is back to her campus in Dublin.

My daughter Eileen left KLIA for Dublin,Ireland at 2330 hrs 4th August 2006 .For three long months she had been relaxing too much in Malaysia .I was a bit worried because she is a Medical student overseas and yet ignored her books during that long ' hibernating period ' , a habit she could not leave . She seems to be obsessed with fun forgetting that real life is not actually like that .Friends would be around only when we are bouncing up with success and they would shun us away if we are otherwise .Therefore in order to have a sustainable long and real friendship we must first of all , ensure ourselves of a position where we would sit and stand on par with that of our friends .In other words we must first of all be a successful person so that no one would look down upon us .Although it sounds silly , but believe me that is a fact of life . Being an elder and have undergone the tribulations of this worldly life ,I can safely vouch that this fact is undeniable . Ask any man/woman of my age and who has undergone 'real' life , I can bet they would be of the same opinion as mine .

Well , now that my daughter has gone back to campus , I hope she would no more rest on her laurels but instead start cracking to regain back the lost 3 months of precious time. She must remember that she is just entering the doors to a challeging future and she should not loose her way to find the exit to success .As the old saying says ' Success does not come easy and one has to really strive to achieve it ' .

As parents I want the best for my children and I would sacrifice everything for their success .Even if God suggest that ,I would not be so successful in life ,if I want my children to be successful people , I would heed to the suggestion . All I have worked for in my life , are all for my children and I do not know what more they would ask from me.

There were times I was really hurt ( feelings ) by my children's behavior . No one knows that I was crying in my heart . I felt I had failed as a parent to educate them to be good human beings , God fearing boys and girls and children who are thankfu to their parents sacrifices .Only God knows how I felt - so hopeless . I console myslef by forgiving them and telling myself that they were still young and immature .

I love all my children. God knows that .