It's already 9 years , since dad left us .

On 8th March 2000 at about 3.00 pm. our beloved dad passed away at my sister's house in Taman Sri Subang , Sunway, Petaling Jaya . All of us were on his bedside when he passed away. Although I was then working in Port Dickson , I had earlier rushed home on being informed of his deteriorating health .He was suffering from Parkinson disease for some time . He was brought back from the Hospital where he was warded for some time . I remember just before he died , he called me near to his bedside . He did not say anything . Perhaps he just wanted to be sure that I was around and perhaps be ready to take over the responsibilty of taking care of the family from him . However, I managed to ask him for his forgiveness . All along we recited the Quran especially the Surah Yassin .My cousin's( Ustaz Ahmad of Taman Abdul Razak , KL.) wife , a religious teacher recited the Surah Yassin and soon after my father passed away peacefully .

The same evening with the help of the committee of the Surau Polis IPD Shah Alam , where I once worked before my transfer to Port Dickson , the burial was performed the same evening .The burial had to be done on the same day because the next day was a working day and there would be no one to help us .I also managed to get permission from the Shah Alam religious authorities to have him buried at the burial ground in Section 21, Shah Alam .

My late father was suffering from Parkinson in silence . No one knew that he was suffering from the disease .Not even the local doctor who treated him . He got his medical treatment from the local Government Health Clinic . There was no specialist there . He was given some medicine but I believed that was not the right one . I suspected that he was suffering from Parkinson , when my friend told me the symptoms of his father who was also suffering from the same disease . As recommended by my friend one day I brought my father to a private specialist doctor at a Specialist Clinic in Jalan Ipoh , Kuala Lumpur . My father was also sent to a MRE to have his head x-rayed . A few weeks later the specialist doctor confirmed that he was suffering from Parkinson disease . For almost half a year my father travelled up and down from Sabak Bernam to Kuala Lumpur to have his regular medical examination and to get his supply of medicine . When I was transferred to Port Dickson, he was later referred to the University Kebangsaan Hospital in Cheras, KL . My illiterate mother listen too much from other people who did not believe in modern medicine and thus discouraged my father from taking his medicine .Infact there was a time when my mother hid his medicine away. Since then , his health began to deteriorate . He was then admitted to the UKM Hospital in Cheras . After a few weeks the doctor suggested that we take him back probably because he knew that he could not do anything more for him .

My only regret was , I did not take care my father's feelings when he was in that condition . I did not know that he was in need of company and some one to talk to . I did not know that Parkinson patients needed to be handled with care because they were sensitive people .They needed company and some one to talk to . Perhaps my father was feeling very lonely then . Due to my nature of job I could not go back home and visit him as often as I could . If only I could get back past time I would very much want to be close to my father and to give him whatever I can afford . That is of course impossible and ridiculous . I love him so much that I named my new house ' Sri Abak ' , a name he was popularly known among relatives . Now , I could only pray to Allah so that He would protect him and he would be among the faithfulls in Heaven . Amin .

The moral of the above story is for young people to take care the feelings of their parents because you might not know that he or she could be suffering from any disease and could be crying in silence . Obviously past time could not be brought back and thus make sure you will not regret it like I do .

Eileen Farhana when she was about 2 years old.

Eileen Farhana when she was about 2 years old at our quarters in the District Police HQ Banting ,Kuala Langat.

Looking forward to go on a Europe Tour

I have registered to be on a Europe Tour in May/June with Reliance Travels Sdn.Bhd. The three of us comprising of me , wife and daughter Farin are scheduled to be in Europe before we attend the convocation of our daughter Eileen at UCD Dublin on 4th.June 2009 . Although this trip is not a cheap one , I feel we deserve a break after all these years of the slogging days and nights to earn a decent living and to enjoy a bit during our retirement period . According to the itinerary we would be leaving KL on 27th May 2009 and our first stop over would be Paris . We would travel to Germany , Belgium , Switzerland and Holland . We would break away from the tour group in London on 3rd.June to enable us to fly to Dublin .

However the unfortunate has happened . The trip which is organised by Reliance Travels has to be cancelled due to lack of participants .We need at least 15 pax to make the trip go through but so far there are only 7 pax . Due to the present economic situation , it is very unlikely that there would be anymore participants .Reliance Travels told me to wait a little longer but I could not take any more risk . By hook or by crook we have to be in Dublin on 4th. June to attend our daughter's convocation .That is supposed to be a life time's event . We do not want to miss it and we do not want to disappoint our daughter Eileen. Since Reliance Travels could not give us an undertaking that the organised trip would go through as scheduled they finally agreed to refund our 10% deposits ( RM 2400.00 ).

Luckily we are just in time for the special offer by MAS . The MAS special offer fare to London is only RM 1400.00 per person inclusive of all the taxes . So I booked online and paid RM 9500.00 for the three of us plus insurance for the return tickets .It is much cheaper than Air Asia . With Air Asia I would have to pay RM 10,800.00 . With MAS the food is free while I would have to pay for our food if we travel by Air Asia . The Air Asia airport in London is at Standstead which is a little further away than Heathrow .We would be arriving in London on 2nd.June around 1618 hrs. From there at about 2110 hrs we would fly to Dublin by Air Lingus and arriving in Dublin at about 2220 hrs. We hope our daughter Eileen would wait for us at the airport .

As for the Europe Tour, we now depend on our daughter Eileen to organise for us, after her convocation . Our trip home would be on 14th.June . I hope there is enough time for us to be in some European countries .

Siti Nuralia Zahra struck with pneumonia .

This morning I visited our grand daughter Alia at the Selangor Medical Centre . She was soundly asleep when I arrived . Her mother told me that she had undergone an X-ray on her chest earlier in the morning because the doctor was not happy with the sound of her breathing . The result of the X-ray would be known in the evening .

In the evening I called my daughter in-law to inquire the outcome of the X-ray and she told me that Alia was suffering from pneumonia . Thus she would have to remain longer at the Medical Centre . My daughter in-law was a little worried because she had been away from office since Chinese New Year and who is to attend to Alia at the Medical Centre if she is to remain longer there . I told her to discuss the matter with her husband Aizad ( our son ) . If there is no choice I guess my wife and I would have to take turn to attend to our grand daughter Alia during the day. At night her parents would have to attend to her . Nevertheless ,I hope she would be cleared from the disease within the week end .

Grand daughter Alia admitted to the Selangor Medical Centre.

Our youngest grand daughter Siti Nuralia Zahra who was borned on 15th.November 2008 was having breathing difficulty since birth . Her nose were always filled with mucous .That made breathing difficult especially when lying down .The doctor at the Maternity Hospital ,Kajang where she was borned told her parents not to worry because according to him she was just allergic to dust and it would cure by itself. I have been telling my son and my daughter in-law to bring Siti Nuralia to a pediatrician for further medical treatment ,because I couldn't bear to see her breathe that way . On 27th January 2009 Siti Nuralia Zahra came to our house with her parents . I noticed her breathing problem did not subside and I was getting worried . Again , I reminded my son and daughter in-law to bring her to the specialist so that her breathing problem could be treated once and for all . I told them not to worry about the expenditure because money can always be earned but not Alia . Infact they waited 8 long years before she could be borned .I am very particular about the health of my family especially the young ones . I would normally insist for them to get early medical treatment at the slightest sickness to avoid further complications . I want them to enjoy good health so that they could go on with their lives without a hitch . Normally , I do not miss to pray for their good health after each of my daily prayers .

The next day around noon my son Aizad called my wife to inform her that our grand daughter Siti Nuralia Zahra had been admitted to the Selangor Medical Centre ,Seksyen 20,Shah Alam . In the evening we went to the Medical Centre to visit our grand daughter . The doctor informed my son that she would be admitted for 3-4 days for treatment and observation .

I hope and pray to Allah that she would be cured from her ailment .

' Abakjr's Blog ' -My new blog on political and current issues.

I have registered a new blog - ' Abakjr's Blog ' : http://abakjr.wordpress.com/ where I can express my feelings on political and current issues . My Jottings is where I write about my personal life . I do not want to mix the two different issues .

One would wonder why I have not written in Bahasa Malaysia -my mother tongue . It is not that I do not love my mother tongue but I feel more comfortable writing in English , although my English may not be that good . It is also a way for me to practice using my English so that with time I would be more proficient in it . Even if I were to write to my children I would normally use English . I also want my children to be able to master the language . My reading materials at home including the newspapers are all in English .

My love for reading and writing was nurtured since my school days . Infact my ambition at that time was to be a writer , journalist or an author . I had never dreamt to be a Police Officer .Infact I hated the Police . An incident that happened to me more than 40 years ago caused the turning point of my life . I was then in Form 5 , a school prefect and an outstanding student among my contemporaries . One night I went out to watch funfare in my small home town .At that time that was the only form of entertainment enjoyed by the kampong folks that came to town once in a blue moon . It was a week end and there was no home work to do . While at the town padang where the funfare was taking place , the Police launched the so called Crime Prevention operation and I was among those herded into the Police station for no obvious reasons .When I asked the officer who was of the rank of Inspector for what reason I was arrested he told me that I was wearing a tight pair of trousers and I was suspected of having a stolen bicycle .What a silly joke he was insinuating on me ? After much pleading finally at about 2.00 am. he allowed me to go home , but without my bicycle . I was told to bring along the bicycle's ' receipt of sale ' the next day if I were to get back my bicycle . Just imagine how I had to brave myself having to walk and run through the dark and rainy night to get home about 2 km. away . It was made worst when I had to pass by the village public cemetery in order to get to my home . I was running and walking and felt as if my feet did not touch the ground because of the tremendous fear of ghosts when I passed by the cemetery . The next morning I had to search for the bicycle's receipt of sale in order to get back my bicycle . Luckily , my late father had the habit of keeping all our important documents in a safe place and I did not find much difficulty retrieving it . However I did not tell any member of my family what had happened the previous night for fear that they would get mad at me and they might impose an extra punishment on me . Infact it still remain a secret till today .

After that incident I vowed to myself that one day I must be a Police officer even if it was only for a short stint in order for me to confront the officers who had caused the unnecessary ' inconvenience ' to me . True enough a few years later I became a Police Officer and I remained so till I retired . The strange thing that subsequently happened some years later was one day I bumped into that Officer who had caused the ' inconvenience ' to me . By then I was already holding a higher rank than him and he was about to retire . This is a true story and perhaps a miracle too which only God could explain . God is Great . Allahu akbar .

Syariah Laws could rid off negative culture from our youths.

Personally , nothing significant about the New Year ( 2009 ) and it's celeberation . I do not know why youths of today pay so much importance to the New Year celeberation . I noticed over the past decade this negative development have been hovering over their heads and thus easily influenced by it .The medias such as the newspapers and the TV stations too are to be blamed for highlighting on it . Intended celeberations of the New Year were made known to the public every other hours on TVs and radios . Our political leaders too were also the culprits for having a hand in them . Thus it is not surprising when youths , young and old came in droves to the venues . Those with a little bit extras in their pockets would continue their activities into the nights till morning in the hotels ,apartments etc. where bottles of liquor by the crates were consumed and then followed by sex parties . It is a shame for a Muslim country such as ours to have allowed or condoned such activities . Such activities are proned in this country , due to our political masters who the majority of them do not realize the that they are answerable to God for failure to abide by God's rule as stated in the Quran ( al-Maidah 5: 44 , 5: 45 , 5: 47 5: 48 ) and the Hadiths . They are too busy with worldly comforts that they have forgotten their obligation to the Creator . Many Muslims do not realize that it is the responsibility of each and every one of them to ensure that Syariah Laws be implemented . All of us are anwerable to Allah for failure to abide by the divine instruction as stated in the holy Quran ( al-Maidah 5: 49 ) . As leaders it is incumbent upon them to try their level best to implement it . I truly believe we will be able to rid our youths off the negative culture ,by implementing and enforcing the ' Syariah Laws' in this country .

I do not see any reason for non-Muslims to be wary of the ' Syariah Laws ' . First and foremost it does not affect them . The ' Syariah Laws ' would be enforced only on Muslims . It is like the requirements for all Muslims to pray 5 times daily or fasting during the month of Ramadhan .The non-Muslims are not required to do so . So why make fuss over the non issue .The non-Muslims should realize that the implementation of the Syariah is a divine instruction from God to all Muslims , failing which all of us ( Muslims ) would be committing sins and thus would face the wrath from God . Many people have a misconception about 'hudud' .Hudud is just the punishment on six or seven offences ( such as thefts , robbery ,sex offences, false accusation of sex offences, liquor consumption and apostacy ) which must be meted according to God's instruction , as stipulated in the Quran. But for hudud punishment to stand is not an easy task . The prosecution has to have 2 ' reliable' eye-witnesses to the offences and for sexual offences there must be 4 'reliable' witnesses . Now , where on earth a person commits theft or rape and etc. witnessed by 2 and 4 people respectively unless it is done in broad day-light ( which if it happens they should deserve the harshest punishment ). This however does not mean that the perpetrators would easily escape scott free . They would still be subjected to the existing laws and be punished accordingly . Only cases that have the 2 and 4 'reliable' eye-witnesses would be subjected to 'hudud' punishment or what has been wrongly termed by those opposed to it's implementation as 'capital' punishment which they also say as barbaric .

I hope the government especially , Muslim scholars and all Muslims in general would make all efforts to explain to Muslims and non-Muslims alike in order to update their knowledge on Syariah and what is 'hudud' punishment so that they would have a better understanding of Islam .

One day I may publish 'My Jottings' into a book .

My wife , son Azman and his wife and Adrina and even Alisya have gone to Johor Bahru on the 26th December 2008. They are expected to be back on the 28th.December 2008 .They were there to send Farin back to her campus after her one month semester holidays . This would be her final semester before she graduates from UTM. I am left alone in the house . I had earlier planned to be with them but because there is no one to look after the house I decided to remain behind .

Being left alone is nothing new to me because I was living alone for 3 years ( 1997 - 2000 ) in Port Dickson when I was the OCPD there . I am now quite used to be a lone ranger especially ever since I retired from my job . It is quite natural for a retiree to be so . Therefore he/she has to accept that fact . We must adapt ourselves fast to that new situation . Otherwise he/she would end up as some one with psychic problems . As for me , I am beginning to feel the joy and excitement being alone . I am free from disturbances and distractions and could concentrate on doing what I am interested in . I have finished reading a book on ' Growing Up in Trengganu ' or ' Guit ' by Wan A.Hulaimi or popularly known as Awang Goneng , who is based in London . Awang Goneng , a native of Trengganu have been living in London for more than 30 years .The book was actually a collection of his memories of Trengganu which was earlier written in his blog . His earlier intention was for the benefit of his children only who were borned and bred in London , to know of his early childhood in Trengganu . What I appreciate most about this book is the English language that he used. Being long in London and being involved in Journalism as a freelance journalist for so long there , his English is what I consider as superb . I have learned new words and his style of wrting . I hope one day I would publish my blog too into a book and would be informative not only to my children and grandchildren but also to the public as a whole .

I would strongly encourage my grand children to take up dentistry.

I think dentist today make much more money than the other doctors . Just imagine my daughter in-law went to the dentist recently to pull out a tooth and it cost her more than RM 150/- . A few weeks earlier my grand daughter Alisya went to the dentist to have her already dangling tooth pulled was also charged about RM 120/- . Last week my daughter Farin went to the dentist to have her teeth straighthened or realigned and the Dental Clinic charged RM 5,000/- . Besides that she has to wear that crazy looking iron cast on her whole set of teeth for 2 years . She also has to visit the clinic every month for the periodic check-ups during that 2 year period . At first I thought she could have been cheated by the dentist but after inquiring with other clinics , I found out that , that was the normal present day fee . I think the fee was a little bit exorbitant charged by the dentist . Something must be done by the government to control the escalating fees by the dentists and health clinics . Pity the poor people and pensioners like me . We are not business men who can make tons of money every time a contract is awarded . Even the business men today are badly hit by the present day economic down turn . This is like day-light robbery by the dentists . Any way , since I have not spent much on Farin for her tertiary education , I thought it would be unfair if I were not to allow her have her teeth realigned . Reluctantly , I had to part with my hard earned RM 5,000/- for the sake of my daughter's ' looks ' .

If only I have another child , I would encourage him/her to take up dentistry . Unfortunately I have no more . Instead , I would strongly encourage my grand daughter Alisya or her sister Alia or even her cousin Adrina to take up the challenge . Not that I am a ' mata duitan ' . It is just that I am a little bit sore with the Dental Clinic .

The gathering of the Jamak family at Puspanitapuri,Putrajaya.

The gathering of the Jamak family .

On 20th.December 2008 morning my wife , daughter Farin and I went to the Puspanitapuri, at Precint 10, Putrajaya and attended the gathering of the Jamak family . Actually , I am not a member of that family but came into it by virtue that I married my wife who is a direct decendent of that Bugis family . She is the 4th. generation of that family while my children are the 5th generation . It was quite a big crowd with members who came from all over the world . There were those who are now settled in the US, UK , Australia ,New Zealand ,Brunei, Singapore and Saudi Arabia . There were prominent people in the Civil Service and the corporate sectors .The most prominent one was the late Tan Sri Taib Andak , the former Chairman of FeLDA . Others include Tan Sri Jaafar Abdul , the former Deputy IGP ,Dato Sri Farouk Abdullah , the son in-law of the Sultan of Perak and many more .

Haji Abdul Jamak b.Majok was a Bugis sea-farer from South Sulawesi,Indonesia . His grandfather was by the name of Menatah . Hj.Abd.Jamak b. Majok and his father Majok left South Sulawesi to find a new life in the Malay archipelago . Having reached Johor they settled down at Bukit Mor ,Muar ,Johor around the year 1800 .At that time there was a Bugis/Malay Kingdom of Padang at Bukit Mor . Jamak b. Majok married Hajjah Aminah ,the daughter of another Bugis warrior Derima @ Dinwa and then settled at Parit Bakar,Muar . They had 10 chidren viz. 1) Hj.Mohamad 2) Hj.Mahmood 3) Hj.Andak 4) Hamidon 5) Safiah 6) Hjh.Khadijah 7) Zainab 8) Hj.Abd.Majid 9) Hassan 10) Hussin. My wife belongs to the Andak family which is the biggest among all .

The programme arranged was from morning till evening . There was a karaoke for members to show their talents in singing , poco-poco dance , magic show and lucky draws . However , we left the venue at about 3.00 pm.

Another cousin passed away .

Just now ( at about 11.00 pm 18th.Dec.2008 ) I received a call from a cousin ,Yassin Mukri of Shah Alam who informed me that another cousin ( a lady ) of ours had passed away in the evening at Kg.Selekoh , Bagan Datok , Perak . She was around 70+ . I last visited her on the 27th.Oct.2007 , about a year ago . She was was already very sick then due to old age . I think she did not even recognised me . Actually she was brought up by my paternal grandmother and so I used to bump into her whenever I came to my grandmother's house which was just besides ours . However , our relationship was a little bit apart when at the age of 10 , I followed my family to live in Sabak Bernam ,Selangor . After that I seldom saw her but only heard that she got married and moved out of my grandmother's house to live with her husband a few miles away .Since it was already late and the funeral would take place next morning , I do not think that I would make it to attend the funeral . Any way I recited the ' alfatihah ' and prayed that her soul would be placed among the good souls in Heaven . Amin .

Lately it seems that one after the other ' people known to me had passed away . Well , that is life - ' From Him we come and to Him we shall return '. No one could escape death . Our beloved Prophet Muhammad pbh. died at the age of 62 . If we are lucky we could reach 70 or even 80 . Only the few could reach 90 and above .Hah , thinking of it I begin to feel cold in my feet . There is not much time left for me to make preparation to be judged by the almighty . I must renew my resolution to be a good Muslim and to fulfill my all obligation to Him .

Never did I know that I would loose a cousin so soon - 12 days after I met him .

Ever since the sms system was known to me , it has been my practice to wish my relatives and friends on festives and special occassions via it . It is so convenient , fast and cheap . So on the eve of Hari Raya Aidil adha this year , I sent quite a number of smses . Among them was the sms which I sent to my cousin Hj.Sulaiman B.Hj.Abd.Samad who was living in Parit Pinang Seribu in Muar , whom I had visited on the 25th October 2008 . I was so surprised and stunned when I received the sms reply from that phone number but sent by his wife informing me that my cousin Hj.Sulaiman had passed away on 6th.November 2008 , 12 days after I visited him . I was not informed of his death till I received that return sms reply from his wife .

At the same time I am grateful to Allah for with His blessing I was able to visit my late cousin on 25th. October .( Refer to the 27th.October 2008 of my blog entry , entitled ' A day in Segamat , a night in Muar and a half day in Melaka ' ). I was so eager to visit him because I had not met him for almost 40 years . We had planned to visit him many times before , but had postponed it due to some unavoidable reasons . When I met him on 25th.Oct.2008 he was already sickly but I did not expect that he would die so soon . We talked for almost an hour reminiscing the good old days of our childhood when we were living as neighbours in Simpang Tiga , Rungkup, Perak . He gave us a good meal of lontong and satay. Since it was still during the Muslim month of Syawal , it was like a visit during the Hari Raya . He asked us to put up the night in his house that night but since we had other plans we had to turn down his offer .We parted that evening but promised him that we would visit him again . Never did I know that it was to be our last meeting .

I could only pray to Allah so that his soul would be among the good souls in Heaven . Amin .

Siti Nuralia Zahra on 6th.December 2008

Obviously she looks matured than before .

Siti Nuralia Zahra is 21 days old today.

I have lost another relative and a good former neighbour.

On 26th. November 2008 I lost another relative , a childhood neighbour and a kind host to us each time we drop over her house when we came back to the village ,Kg.Batu 38, Sabak Bernam . Mak Hamid or Hamid's mother , we used to call her . It was a normal practice for us in the village to call some one older by the eldest son or daughter's name . Since Hamid was her eldest son , so we called her Hamid's mother .Her actual name was Hajjah Salasiah/Lasiah , if I am not mistaken . She was about 70 years old and was suffering from what we Malaysians used to call as the 3 in 1 disease ( heart , kidney and diabetic problems ) .I was told she was admitted to the Tengku Ampuan Rahimah Hospital, Klang for some time .Unfortunately I came to know about it only on 11th. October 2008 , even that was informed by some one through a slip of the tongue .

On 12th.October 2008 my wife and I went to the Tengku Ampuan Hospital and visited her at Ward No:7 . She was so happy to see us although she was in pain . Unexpectedly , she asked forgiveness from me and so did I . Before we left her we told her that we would be visiting her again and that we would pray for her recovery .I did not expect that she would die . After that I left for Sarawak . While in Sarawak I called my wife to ask her to visit her at the Hospital to check on her development . Subsequently my wife went the Hospital .Unfortunately , she was not able to see her as she did not know that she had been moved to another Ward . My wife did not pursue further because she thought that she could have been discharged from the Hospital . However on 21st Nov. 2008 I was told by a relative that she was still in the Hospital but was transfered to Ward 8 .On 24th. November 2008 my wife and I went to Ward 8 of the Hospital but was told by the nurse that there was no one by that name admitted into that Ward . So we came back feeling hopeless .

On 27th.November 2008 at about 7.30 am I received a telephone call from Hamid who informed us that his mother had passed away . We were so sad because we visited her only once in the Hospital and now she had passed away . At about 7.40 am we left our home and drove our car to the village to make our courtesy call before her ' last journey ' . We reached the house at about 9.30 am and saw the big crowd there . I had the opportunity to take part in the prayer for her last rites before her burial . Later, I also went to the cemetry and gave my helping hand in the burial process . As it was raining earlier , the cemetry was very muddy . My feet and my trousers was practically soaked with mud .Any way I was satisfied for I had given my helping hand for a good cause .

She was our last relative in the village . Before this I would normally never miss to visit her and her family each time we came back to the village . Now , that she is gone we have no one else to visit there . I guess we have no more reason to be back at the village .

May Allah bless her and may her soul be among the good souls in heaven .

Amin.

We visited Siti Nuralia Zahra at her maternal grand parent's house in Kajang today ( 23rd.Nov.2008 ) .She looks like her sister Alisya.

Today ( 23rd.Nov.2008 )Siti Nuralia Zahra is 7 days old. She looks cute today.

Azman receiving his MBA at UiTM Shah Alam.It was officiated by the Yang Di Pertuan Agong, Sultan Mizan.